


synonymous

by sarahyyy



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Asian Parenting, Family, Gen, Misunderstandings, Pre-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-18
Updated: 2018-11-18
Packaged: 2019-08-25 08:59:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,227
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16658113
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sarahyyy/pseuds/sarahyyy
Summary: “He’s your father,” Guang Hong’s mother says. “Of course he misses you when you’re not at home.”Sometimes he really wonders if he’s really his father’s biological son, but he doesn’t voice that to his mother.“Maybe next time,” he tells his mother. “It’s almost bedtime. I don’t want him to go to bed angry.”





	synonymous

“Ma, don’t be like this.”

In school, they like to ask Guang Hong if it’s hard not living with his parents, if it’s hard to only see them once in a couple of weeks. 

His honest answer is this — _no_. 

No, because something like this inevitably happens every time he comes home. 

“I just don’t understand,” his mother says. “Isn’t it easier on you if you just focus on studying?”

There is a scoff from behind Guang Hong, and he tenses, already preparing for the fight that is no doubt going to happen. 

“What don’t you understand?” his father asks. “You always coddle the boy, always give into his whims, tell him that he is smart enough to make his own decisions. And now look at him — wasting his time fantasising about dancing on ice instead of working on his _gaokao_!”

“I’m not-” Guang Hong starts, but then thinks better of trying to correct his father. “I’m still attending classes, and I’m still doing relatively well. This is an extracurricular activity just as much as the math olympiad team is. This won’t have a bearing on my university prospects!” 

“Universities look at intellectual extracurricular activities, boy. Not dancing.” 

“That’s not what it is,” Guang Hong protests. “I’m good at figure-skating. My coach says that I could have a future in it if I start getting some exposure in competitions now.”

“And now you want to do competitions!” his father exclaims. “Look at your son,” he tells Guang Hong’s mother. “Look at your good son! Why did we bother spending so much money sending him to such a good school? First he wants to drop out of the school math olympiad team, and now he wants to enter dancing competitions!” 

“It’s _figure-skating_!” Guang Hong snaps. “And it’s classified as a sport, which means that if I win the national competition, I’ll be exempted from the national entrance exam too, won’t I? That’s what you want, isn’t it? For me to be exempted from the exams so that you can brag about it?” 

“Hong’er, don’t raise your voice at your father,” his mother says, startled. 

Guang Hong’s father scoffs. “Let him yell! Sooner or later, he’ll realise that I’m right, and that he will never amount to anything if he keeps insisting on deviating from our plans for him!” 

This always happens. 

They have been having the same fight for a little more than a year now. 

His father has always made it clear that he doesn’t think Guang Hong can do anything, so the words shouldn’t make his eyes sting.

 _And yet._

“I’ll prove you wrong,” Guang Hong says quietly. “You’ll see one day.”

—

“You shouldn’t have fought with your father again,” Coach Yu tells him. “You know he just want what’s best for you.”

“If he wants what’s best for me, he should _support_ me.”

“He is still paying for your training,” Coach reminds him gently. “That says a lot more than his words do.”

Guang Hong pauses. “About that.”

Coach sighs. “You are so hot-headed sometimes.” 

“You don’t even know what I’m going to say yet.” 

“You want to know if I will stop taking money from your father.”

“I’ll pay for it myself,” Guang Hong says. “I can work part-time somewhere. I’ll be able to do it. Trust me, Coach, please.” 

“Guang Hong, you can’t study, train, and work at the same time without wearing yourself thin.”

“I don’t want to use his money for this.” Guang Hong looks away from Coach. “That way… That way, if he’s right-”

“Guang-”

“ _If he’s right_ , then at least he’ll have one less thing to hold over me.” 

“Guang Hong.” 

“The way he spoke today, Coach. You should’ve heard him.” His eyes sting again, and Coach must know that Guang Hong is close to tears, because she looks away. “He was so convinced. He was so sure that I would fail. And I know that I shouldn’t listen to him, but there’s this part of me that keeps thinking that he could be onto something if he can be so certain about it.”

Coach is silent for a long time, but Guang Hong knows better than to interrupt her when she appears to be thinking. 

“I won’t have you looking for a part-time job,” Coach says finally, and Guang Hong deflates. “As it is, if we are to get you ready for competitions, you’ll need to put a lot more time into training on the rink. You won’t have time to spare to work part-time.”

Guang Hong nods mutely, still disappointed.

“But I won’t take your father’s money from now on,” Coach says, eyeing him. “Don’t look at me like that. I know how much this means to you, but I’m not agreeing to do this for free. I’ll bill you for every hour I spend on you, and I expect you to pay me back with all the sponsorship money we’re going to get you _when_ you become a national champion.” 

He knows that Coach hates it when he gets emotional, but his tears fall all the same. “ _Coach_ -”

“I don’t care how certain your father is that you won’t succeed in the figure-skating world. I’m even more certain that he’s wrong. We’re going to turn you into an figure-skating superstar, Ji Guang Hong.”

—

“Are you eating well?”

“Mm.”

“Are you sleeping well?”

“Mm.”

“Do you get enough rest?”

“Mm.”

There is a long sigh on the other end of the line. “Why don’t you talk to him? He’s just in the living room now. I can just go pass the phone to him.”

“I’d rather not, Ma,” Guang Hong says quietly. “You know he only gets angry when he talks to me.”

“You know he misses you when you’re not here, right?”

“Ma, you don’t have to lie to me,” Guang Hong says. 

“He’s your father,” Guang Hong’s mother says. “Of course he misses you when you’re not at home.”

Sometimes he really wonders if he’s really his father’s biological son, but he doesn’t voice that to his mother.

“Maybe next time,” he tells his mother. “It’s almost bedtime. I don’t want him to go to bed angry.”

His mother sighs again. “You’re a good boy, Guang Hong.”

“Of course I am,” Guang Hong says, smiling slightly now. “I’m your son, aren’t I?”

—

Coach squints at him. “Are you hurt? Are you in pain?” 

Guang Hong shakes his head. 

“Then that was sloppy,” Coach says. 

Says, “ _Again_.” 

And says, “Guang Hong, you need to _try harder_.”

Coach has put a lot of work, a lot of money into Guang Hong, and the least he can do is to return her favour.

He closes his eyes, and tells himself that he needs to work through the fatigue. 

“Yes, Coach.”

—

He fumbles at his first competition. 

“I’m sorry,” Guang Hong tells Coach. “I- I didn’t try hard enough.”

“Do you think that’s what you did wrong?” Coach asks. 

“I-”

She doesn’t give him the chance to reply. “Did you try your best?” she follows up with.

Guang Hong nods.

“And do you still enjoy skating?” 

He nods again.

“Then you are doing alright,” Coach concludes.

—

The Spring Festival is about family reunions, about celebrating the passing of another year with your family.

Guang Hong doesn’t go home. 

“It’s quiet without you here,” Guang Hong’s mother tells him when he calls her. 

“It’s quiet when I’m there, too,” Guang Hong says, flopping onto his bed. He’s learnt not to be too picky with hotel beds now, no matter how squeaky they might be. “I’m sorry I can’t be home, Ma.”

“It’s been a long time since you last came home,” she tells him. 

“I’m sorry,” Guang Hong says again, and he really means it. He might not get along well with his father, but he knows that his mother dotes on him and misses him when he’s away. “I’ll arrange to come home for the weekend after this.”

“Your father will be happy to know.”

Guang Hong closes his eyes. “How is he?”

“He’s well,” Guang Hong’s mother says. “He had his medical checkup recently. Cholesterol’s a little high, but nothing too serious. I’m watching his diet now. No more stir-fried liver for him.”

Guang Hong lets out a chuckle at that. “Bet he’s upset about that.”

“Not upset enough to make his own food,” Guang Hong’s mother assures him. 

“Tell him he has to cut down on red meat too,” Guang Hong suggests. “That might push him over the edge.”

“You are a terrible child, Hong’er,” his mother chides. Then, “I’ll try it tomorrow, and tell you how he reacts.”

Guang Hong laughs.

—

The first medal Guang Hong gets from a competition, he mails to his father. 

Just the medal. 

No letter, no explanation. 

His father doesn’t call him, but that’s alright. 

Guang Hong wasn’t expecting him to anyway.

That entire week, though, Guang Hong walks with a spring in his step, buoyed by his improvement and his win. 

Coach must be exceptionally proud of him, too, because she brings him a bag of vitamins and Chinese tonics. “Make sure you eat them,” she reminds him. “I was told the herbs all go together to make a really effective tonic soup, but just to be safe, maybe check with your mother.”

“Coach, you really don’t have to buy me things,” Guang Hong says, clutching at the bag.

“I know,” Coach tells him. “But they’re here now, so make sure you use them.”

Guang Hong beams. “Yes, Coach! Thank you, Coach!” 

—

“I’ll start making dinner,” Guang Hong’s mother declares. “I’ll make all your favourite dishes. You are too thin now! You must’ve lied to me about eating properly.”

“Ma, I’m not thin, I’m lean. It’s good for an athlete to be this size.”

His mother rolls her eyes. “Athlete or no, you’re at home now, and I expect you to eat at least two bowls of rice for dinner tonight.”

“I’m sure I will, if you’re going to make all my favourite dishes.” Guang Hong shakes his head, smiling slightly. “I’ll help you out in the kitchen.”

His mother shakes her head. “No, no. I’m fine working alone in the kitchen. You should go and talk to your father.”

“I-”

“You haven’t spoken to him in awhile now, Hong’er,” she says. “He’s your _father_.”

Guang Hong sighs, knowing that protesting any further isn’t going to help. “I’ll _try_ ,” Guang Hong says. “But if I go join you in the kitchen after making him mad, you don’t get to say anything about it.”

“Deal,” she says, and pushes Guang Hong towards the direction of his father’s study.

Guang Hong sighs, and makes his way there.

“Ma says she’s going to start making dinner,” he tells his father.

“Mm.”

“You probably have to take your cholesterol pills before dinner.”

“Mm.”

Guang Hong sighs. “Coach Yu and I have been talking about going to the US for a training camp.”

His father looks up at that. “What? It’s not good enough to skate in a different town anymore, and now you want to move out of the country?”

“It’s just for a training camp. I’ll be gone for six weeks, if that. I won’t be moving permanently.” 

“Do whatever you want. It’s not like you come home much while you’re in the country anyway,” his father says, and turns back to the newspaper. 

Guang Hong blinks, honestly expecting more resistance than this. “Is that it? You’re okay with me going?”

His father snorts. “It’s not like I can talk you out of it anyway.”

“Uhm.”

“Come and call me when dinner is ready,” his father says.

—

Guang Hong’s father doesn’t come to see him off in the airport on the day he’s due to fly to the US, but that’s okay because Guang Hong wasn’t really expecting him to anyway.

His mother explained that his father really wanted to come, but was stuck in a meeting at work instead. It sounds a lot like a bold-faced lie to Guang Hong, but he keeps his mouth shut to humour his mother. 

“Are you upset that your father didn’t show up?” Coach asks as they are walking to their gate. 

“Not really,” Guang Hong says with a shrug. “You know what he’s like. I wasn’t really expecting him to be here.”

Coach sighs. “Your father loves you, Guang Hong.”

“I’m sure you think he does.”

“I _know_ he does,” Coach snaps. “Because if he didn’t love you, he wouldn’t have paid for your trip.”

Guang Hong stops walking. “What?” 

“He really didn’t want me to tell you, but I feel like keeping the truth from you will only strain your relationship with your father even more,” Coach says. “The truth is, he’s been paying for all of this. For your coaching, for your training… Hell, he even went and got tonics for you himself.”

“ _What_?”

“Your father really loves you,” Coach says gently. “And he’s been supportive of your choices, even if he hasn’t been willing to say so.”

Oh. 

“He asks about your progress sometimes,” Coach tells him. “I think he’s just not too adapt at expressing his concern, or his pride towards you. But he is, though. Proud of you. He’s always so happy when I tell him you’ve done well in competitions.”

_Oh._

—

 **To: Pa**  
Thank you.

 **From: Pa**  
Good luck.

**Author's Note:**

> I am [here on Tumblr](http://sarah-yyy.tumblr.com/), come say hi! :D
> 
> This was my piece for the [Kings on Ice zine](https://kingsonicezine.tumblr.com/)! Make sure y'all check out all the other pieces! :D


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